Deadpool: Now, I'm about to do to you what Limp Bizkit did to music in the late 90s.
出自電影《死侍：不死現身》 的經典對白。
更多死侍：不死現身的經典對白
Deadpool: All dinosaurs feared the T-Rex!
Deadpool: Time to make the chimi-fuckin'-changas.
Deadpool: A fourth wall break inside a fourth wall break? That's like, sixteen walls.
Deadpool: Whatever they did to me made me totally indestructible... and completely unfuckable.
Deadpool: Now, I'm about to do to you what Limp Bizkit did to music in the late 90s.
Deadpool: Daddy needs to express some rage.
Weasel: I'd go with you, but... I don't want to.
Deadpool: I've never said this to anyone before, but don't swallow!
Deadpool: Ugh, stupid, stupid. Worth it!
Deadpool: I didn't just get the cure to el cancer, I got the cure to el everything.
Deadpool: Ahhhh. I'm touching myself tonight.
Wade Wilson: Your right leg is Thanksgiving and your left leg is Christmas. Can I come and visit you between the holidays?
Deadpool: Shit. Did I leave the stove on?
Deadpool: There's no easy way to say this... I'm pregnant, Trevor!
Deadpool: You, go be a big brother to someone! And tell Beast to stop shitting on my lawn!
Deadpool: Okay guys, I only have twelve bullets, so you're all going to have to share!
Wade Wilson: I bet it feels huge in this hand.
Deadpool: Are you there God? It's me, Margaret!
Strip Club DJ: You can't buy love, but you can rent it for three minutes!
Deadpool: Nice to see you, Jared. I'll take the foot long... Fully loaded.
Wade Wilson: You got something in your teeth.
Deadpool: This is confusing. Is it sexist to hit you? Is it more sexist to not hit you? I mean, the line gets real... blurry!
Vanessa Carlysle: I've played a lot of roles, damsel in distress ain't one of them.
Deadpool: If I never see you again, know that I love you.
Blind Al: Use seltzer water and lemon juice for blood. Or wear red, dumbass!
Deadpool: Goddammit! I'm gonna do this the old-fashioned way: with two swords, and maximum effort.
Deadpool: Sure, I may be stuck looking like pepperoni flatbread but at least fuckface won't heal from that.
Wade Wilson: You're clowning. You're not clowning? I sense clowns.
Deadpool: I'm a bad guy who is paid to fuck up worse guys.
Deadpool: Where is Francis? Where the fuck is Francis? Where's Francis?
Deadpool: Did I say this was a love story? It's a horror movie.
Deadpool: Ever hear of the one-legged man in the ass-kicking contest?
Ajax: Fucking Wade Wilson. Suppose I'd wear a mask, too, if I had a face like that. I only wish I'd heal the same.
Deadpool: How can I help you... besides luring children into a panel van?
Weasel: I would go with you, but... I don't want to.
Teen Girl #1: Hey, could you talk to my Father-in-Law?
Deadpool: Did you ever see 127 Hours? Spoiler alert.
Deadpool: Did you ever see 127 Hours? Spoiler alert.
Deadpool: All dinosaurs feared the T-Rex!
Deadpool: Time to make the chimi-fuckin'-changas.
Deadpool: A fourth wall break inside a fourth wall break? That's like, sixteen walls.
Deadpool: Now, I'm about to do to you what Limp Bizkit did to music in the late 90s.
Deadpool: Daddy needs to express some rage.
Weasel: I'd go with you, but... I don't want to.
Deadpool: Whatever they did to me made me totally indestructible... and completely unfuckable.
Deadpool: I've never said this to anyone before, but don't swallow!
Deadpool: Ugh, stupid, stupid. Worth it!
Deadpool: I didn't just get the cure to el cancer, I got the cure to el everything.
Deadpool: Ahhh! Your poor wife!
Deadpool: Rich Corinthian leather.
Deadpool: Shit. Did I leave the stove on?
Deadpool: Maximum effort.
Deadpool: There's no easy way to say this... I'm pregnant, Trevor!
Deadpool: Right up Main Street.
Deadpool: Ahhhh. I'm touching myself tonight.
Wade Wilson: Your right leg is Thanksgiving and your left leg is Christmas. Can I come and visit you between the holidays?
Colossus: You will come talk with Professor Xavier. Deadpool: McAvoy or Stewart? These timelines can get so confusing.
Deadpool: I know right? You're probably thinking, "Whose balls did I have to fondle to get my very own movie"? I can't tell you his name, but it rhymes with "Polverine." Deadpool: And let me tell you, he's got a nice pair of smooth criminals down under.
Deadpool: And you are? Negasonic Teenage Warhead: Negasonic Teenage Warhead. Deadpool: Negasonic Teenage... what the shit? That's the coolest name ever!
Wade Wilson: I had another Liam Neeson nightmare. I kidnapped his daughter and he just wasn't having it. Wade Wilson: They made three of those movies. At some point you have to wonder if he's just a bad parent.
Deadpool: That's right! You're about to be killed by a zamboni! Deadpool: Tell me where your fucking boss is or you're going to die! In five minutes!
Blind Al: I get why you're so pissy, but your mood's never gonna brighten 'till you find this woman and tell her how you feel. Deadpool: What do I keep telling you, Mrs. Magoo? She wouldn't have me. If you could see me, you'd understand. Blind Al: Looks aren't everything. Deadpool: Looks ARE everything! Ever heard Dave Beckham speak? It's like he mouth-sexed a can of helium. You think Ryan Reynolds got this far on a superior acting method? Blind Al: Love is blind, Wade. Deadpool: No. You're blind. Blind Al: So you're just gonna lie there and whimper? Deadpool: No, I'm gonna wait 'till this arm plows through puberty, and then I'll come up with a whole new Christmas day plan.
Deadpool: Ripley, from Alien 3! Negasonic Teenage Warhead: Fuck, you're old. Deadpool: Fake laugh. Hiding real pain. Go get Silver Balls.
Deadpool: You're a lovely lady, but I'm saving myself for Francis. That's why I brought him. Colossus: I prefer not to hit a woman, so please... Deadpool: I mean, that's why I brought her? Deadpool: Oh, no, finish your tweet. It's not... That's... Just give us a second. Yeah. There you go. Hashtag it. Go get her, tiger. Deadpool: Oh, I so pity the dude who pressures her into prom sex.
Wade Wilson: Here's what I'm actually gonna do? I'm gonna work through his crew until somebody gives up Francis, force him to fix this, and then put a bullet in his skull and fuck the brain hole. Weasel: I don't want to see that or think of it again. But the douchebag does think your dead, right? Wade Wilson: Yeah. Weasel: That's good. You should keep it that way. Wade Wilson: What, like, wear a mask? Weasel: Yes. A very thick mask. All the time. I am sorry... you are haunting. Your face is the stuff of nightmares. Wade Wilson: Like a testicle with teeth. Weasel: You will die alone. I mean, if you could die. Ideally, for others' sake.
Wade Wilson: Do you like what you see? Weasel: No. You look like an avocado had sex with an older, more disgusting avocado. Wade Wilson: Yeah. Weasel: Not gently. Like it was hate-fucking. There was something wrong with the relationship and that was the only catharsis that they could find without violence. Wade Wilson: And the only guy the who fix this fugly mug is the British shitstick who ran the mutant factory. And he's gone. Poof! Weasel: Yeah, well you gotta do something to remedy this because as of now, you only have one course of action. Wade Wilson: Damn straight. Find Francis. Weasel: Star in horror films. Wade Wilson: What? Weasel: Star in your own horror films. Because you look like Freddy Krueger face-fucked a topographical map of Utah.
Vanessa Carlysle: So, am I suppose to just smile and wave you out the door? Wade Wilson: Think of it like spring cleaning. Only if spring was death. God, if I had a nickel for every time I spanked it to Bernadette Peters. Vanessa Carlysle: Sounds like you do. Bernadette is not going anywhere, because you're not going anywhere. Drink. Wade Wilson: You're right. Cancer is only in my liver, lungs, prostate, and brain. All the things I can live without.
Recruiter: What if I told you we can cure your cancer? And what's more, give you abilities most mean only dream of? Wade Wilson: I'd say that you sound like an infomercial, but not a good one, like Slap Chop. More Shake Weight-y.
Deadpool: Wait! You may be wondering, "Why the red suit?" Well, that's so bad guys can't see me bleed. Deadpool: This guy's got the right idea. he wore the brown pants.
Deadpool: I should've come and found you sooner, but the guy under this mask, he ain't the same one that you remember. Vanessa Carlysle: You mean this mask? Deadpool: And this one, in case the other fell off. Vanessa Carlysle: Wow. Wade Wilson: Yeah. Vanessa Carlysle: After a brief adjustment period and a bunch of drinks, it's a face... I'd be happy to sit on.
Deadpool: Oh! Oh, hello! I know right? Whose balls did I have to fondle to get my very own movie? I can't tell you, but it does rhyme with Polverine. Deadpool: And let me tell you, he's got a nice pair of smooth criminals down under.
Deadpool: You, go be a big brother to someone! And tell Beast to stop shitting on my lawn!
