Patches O'Houlihan: Holy hell, son, you're about as useful as a cock-flavored lollipop!
出自電影《鐵男躲避球》 的經典對白。
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Patches O'Houlihan: Holy hell, son, you're about as useful as a cock-flavored lollipop!
Patches O'Houlihan: If you're going to become true dodgeballers, then you've got to learn the five d's of dodgeball: dodge, duck, dip, dive and dodge!
White Goodman: I know you. You know you. And I know you know that I know you.
Patches O'Houlihan: And will someone catch a goddamn ball? It's like watching a bunch of retards trying to fuck a doorknob out there!
Patches O'Houlihan: If you can dodge traffic, you can dodge a ball.
White Goodman: Allow me the pleasure of introducing you to Blade... Laser... Blazer...
Patches O'Houlihan: If you want to have dodgeball victory, you have to grab it by its haunches and you gotta hump it into submission!
Fran: I am in extreme state of arousal. Please to make sex all over my face.
Peter La Fleur: Come on, Kate. It's time to put your mouth where our balls are.
Steve the Pirate: Steve's gotta go drain the sea-monster.
Peter La Fleur: Too bad Hallmark doesn't make a "Sorry your dodgeball coach got killed by two tons of irony" card.
White Goodman: I'm white. I'm white. W-H-I-T... E.
Patches O'Houlihan: I love the smell of queef in the morning.
Pepper Brooks: I feel like I'm watching a Cher video.
Young Patches O'Houlihan: Dodgeball is a sport of violence, exclusion, and degradation.
White Goodman: You happy? Fatty make a funny?
Peter La Fleur: You're adopted! Your parents don't even love you!
White Goodman: Spare me... I won that tournament... fuckin' Chuck Norris!
Patches O'Houlihan: You couldn't hit water if you fell out of a boat!
Patches O'Houlihan: Tomorrow, we're gonna pecker-slap those Globo Gym bastards!
Young Patches O'Houlihan: This is Patches O'Houlihan saying "Take care of your balls, and they'll take care of you."
Peter La Fleur: You had me at blood and semen.
Patches O'Houlihan: I ain't crazy and I ain't a guy.
Steve the Pirate: I'm gonna send you all to hell!
Patches O'Houlihan: Come on! I get better runs in my shorts!
White Goodman: Here at Globo Gym we're better than you, and we know it.
White Goodman: We ARE the Globo Gym Purple Cobras... and we will, we will, rock you!
German Coach: You are all swine! You have brought shame to your houses! Losers!
Peter La Fleur: Well, if you can't raise fifty thousand dollars with an impromptu carwash, I guess it just wasn't in the cards.
Pepper Brooks: Good toss by the submissive out there!
Patches O'Houlihan: Listen up, crotch stain. Remember your training, and trust your instincts. You can do it! I believe in you! Bye-bye!
Patches O'Houlihan: You're about as useful as a poopie-flavored lollipop.
White Goodman: Nobody makes White Goodman bleed his own blood.
White Goodman: Prepare to be humiliated on cable television!
White Goodman: And they love you. Whoo, do they love you. You're their Fonzie, Pete. "Heeeeey." Right?
Patches O'Houlihan: Go you crazy son of a bitch GO!
Patches O'Houlihan: Those men and that muff-diver believe in you.
White Goodman: You're going down like a sweet muffin!
Voice on phone: This is Seth from Videorama. The following DVDs are now overdue: "Drunken Hussies 3", "Backdoor Patrol 5" and "Bona Lisa Smile". Thank you.
White Goodman: Do you smell that fitness? I do.
Steve the Pirate: Yarr, I be the dread pirate Steve!
Fran: Please to do it again... from the backside.
White Goodman: You like the freaky stuff, huh? That's cool. I can be naughty, too. Real, freaky naughty.
Patches O'Houlihan: Holy hell, son, you're about as useful as a cock-flavored lollipop!
Patches O'Houlihan: If you're going to become true dodgeballers, then you've got to learn the five d's of dodgeball: dodge, duck, dip, dive and dodge!
White Goodman: I know you. You know you. And I know you know that I know you.
Patches O'Houlihan: If you can dodge traffic, you can dodge a ball.
Patches O'Houlihan: If you want to have dodgeball victory, you have to grab it by its haunches and you gotta hump it into submission!
Fran: I am in extreme state of arousal. Please to make sex all over my face.
Peter La Fleur: Come on, Kate. It's time to put your mouth where our balls are.
White Goodman: I'm white. I'm white. W-H-I-T... E.
Steve the Pirate: Steve's gotta go drain the sea-monster.
White Goodman: Allow me the pleasure of introducing you to Blade... Laser... Blazer...
Young Patches O'Houlihan: Dodgeball is a sport of violence, exclusion, and degradation.
White Goodman: You happy? Fatty make a funny?
Peter La Fleur: Too bad Hallmark doesn't make a "Sorry your dodgeball coach got killed by two tons of irony" card.
Patches O'Houlihan: And will someone catch a goddamn ball? It's like watching a bunch of retards trying to fuck a doorknob out there!
Cotton McKnight: I'm being told that Average Joe's does not have enough players and will be forfeiting the championship match. Pepper Brooks: It's a bold strategy, Cotton. Let's see if it pays off for 'em.
Cotton McKnight: In 23 years of broadcasting I thought I'd seen it all, folks. But it looks like Peter La Fleur has actually blindfolded himself. Pepper Brooks: He will not be able to see very well, Cotton.
Kate Veatch: For instance, do you realize you haven't collected any membership fees in 13 months? Peter La Fleur: Hmmm... Kate Veatch: I'm curious, is it strictly apathy, or do you really not have a goal in life? Peter La Fleur: I found that if you have a goal, that you might not reach it. But if you don't have one, then you are never disappointed. And I gotta tell ya... it feels phenomenal. Kate Veatch: Well I guess that makes sense, in a really sad way. Peter La Fleur: Sad? You want to know what's sad? Six grown men playing dodgeball.
Peter La Fleur: You really think you can come in here and buy me out, White, you're a lot dumber than I thought. White Goodman: Oh, I don't think I'm a lot dumber than you thought that I think that I thought that I was once.
Peter La Fleur: You need some help leaving White? White Goodman: This doesn't concern you, Lafleur. Peter La Fleur: Not nearly as much as your hair does, that's for sure, but uh, I believe she asked you to leave. White Goodman: I get it, you caught the scent of a lesser stag in your nostrils. Pity. I'll let you have your little moment, LaFleur, 'cause after this tournament, your gym, your life - and your gal - are gonna be mine. To be continued. Kate Veatch: You don't get to touch me, ever! Peter La Fleur: Okay, Romeo, let me help you up. White Goodman: Get off of me, don't you touch me! It is over between us, Kate. Nobody makes me bleed my own blood - nobody!
Cotton McKnight: Looks like it's gonna be a two-on-one, a ménage à trois of pain. Pepper Brooks: Usually you pay double for that kind of action, Cotton.
Cotton McKnight: Average Joe's has a tough job, facing the Lumberjacks. These woodsmen probably haven't even smelled a woman in eight months. Pepper Brooks: They must masturbate a lot, Cotton.
White Goodman: We should mate. Kate Veatch: What? White Goodman: Date! We should date some time. Socially. Go out and kick it. White Goodman: Are you okay? Kate Veatch: I'm fine. I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. White Goodman: In some cultures, they only eat vomit. I never been there, but I read about it... *in a book*.
Kate Veatch: What? Eight years of softball. Dwight: Man, she gotta be a lesbian. Peter La Fleur: She is *not* a lesbian. Patches O'Houlihan: All I know is, that dyke can play!
Cotton McKnight: Oh! Right in the testicles! Pepper Brooks: Ouchtown, population you, bro!
Dwight: We're still missing the teenage love puppy and Steve the Pirate. Owen: Who's Steve the Pirate? Dwight: The only guy on our team that dresses like a pirate! Owen: Wait, there's a guy on our team who dresses like a pirate?
White Goodman: This is it, La 'Loser.' You ready for the, whoo, hurricane? Peter La Fleur: Just don't go cryin' to your mommy when I spank you in front of all these people, White. White Goodman: You don't go cryin' to your daddy after I wipe it up with your face. Peter La Fleur: Uh, White? White Goodman: Yeah? Peter La Fleur: You look awful fat in those pants.
Kate Veatch: Are you reading the dictionary? White Goodman: Oh, you caught me. I like to break a mental sweat too.
Peter La Fleur: Hang on a second. You wanna become a cheerleader to prove you are not a loser? Justin: Yeah. Why? Peter La Fleur: Nothing. High school's changed a bit since I was a kid.
Patches O'Houlihan: I love the smell of queef in the morning.
Owen: Look on the bright side, at least we've still got Peter! Dwight: Yeah, but Globo Gym's got guys named Laser, and Blazer, and Tazer, and all kinds of "azer's"! Without Patches, we're going to get our taints handed to us, that's what! Justin: What's a taint? Gordon: I don't know, but it sounds *bad*!
White Goodman: This doesn't concern you, La Fleur. Peter La Fleur: Not nearly as much as your hair does.
White Goodman: Donde está la biblioteca, Pedro? Peter La Fleur: White? White Goodman: We're opening a new Globo Gym in Mexico City, so I've been boning up on my Spanish.
Cotton McKnight: It looks like the clock is about to strike midnight on this Cinderella story, turning Average Joe's into the proverbial pumpkin. Pepper Brooks: I sure do like pumpkins, Cotton.
Cotton McKnight: We haven't seen Average Joe's yet. They haven't made it to the court. It could be a psychological ploy, or something worse. Pepper Brooks: They're definitely not on the court, Cotton. Their absence is noticeable.
White Goodman: Meet Fran Stalinofskivitchdavitovichsky. In her home country of Romanovia, dodgeball is the national sport and her nuclear power plant's team won the championship five years running, which makes her the deadliest woman on earth with a dodgeball. Ball me, Blazer. White Goodman: Show them, Fran. White Goodman: And that's just her change-up. End of demo. We are the Globo Gym Purple Cobras, and we will, we will, rock you! Justin: I think that guy might really be dead.
Patches O'Houlihan: Tomorrow, we're gonna pecker-slap those Globo Gym bastards!
Kate Veatch: What? Eight years of softball. Dwight: Man, she gotta be a lesbian. Peter La Fleur: She is not a lesbian. Patches O'Houlihan: All I know is, that dyke can play!
