Alan: My name's Alan and I bought a giraffe! Oh, my life is perfect!
出自電影《醉後大丈夫 3》 的經典對白。
更多醉後大丈夫 3的經典對白
Alan: My name's Alan and I bought a giraffe! Oh, my life is perfect!
Stu: Someone needs to burn this place to the ground.
Mr. Chow: You want Chow spirit hang over you when you make fuck on your wife?
Marshall: Leslie Chow stole $21,000,000 from me, on a Tuesday.
Alan: Did you know your name used to be Carlos? I think it suits you better.
Mr. Chow: We do a deal! I make good wife for you!
Mr. Chow: You got something to say to me now, blue-eyes? No more silent treatment?
Mr. Chow: I believe I can fly! I believe I can touch the sky! Think about it every night and day! Spread my wings and fly away!
Alan: I can't believe my daddy is dead. I can think of so many people I would rather have died first, like my mother.
Alan: My name's Alan and I bought a giraffe! Oh, my life is perfect!
Stu: Someone needs to burn this place to the ground.
Mr. Chow: You want Chow spirit hang over you when you make fuck on your wife?
Marshall: Leslie Chow stole $21,000,000 from me, on a Tuesday.
Alan: Did you know your name used to be Carlos? I think it suits you better.
Mr. Chow: We do a deal! I make good wife for you!
Mr. Chow: You got something to say to me now, blue-eyes? No more silent treatment?
Alan: My name's Alan and I bought a giraffe! Oh, my life is perfect!
Stu: Someone needs to burn this place to the ground.
Mr. Chow: I believe I can fly! I believe I can touch the sky! Think about it every night and day! Spread my wings and fly away!
Alan: I can't believe my daddy is dead. I can think of so many people I would rather have died first, like my mother.
Phil: What the fuck is wrong with those chickens? Mr. Chow: They're angry. All I feed them is cocaine. And chicken.
Alan: Nothing worse than losing your phone. Stu: You just saw a man get murdered. Your brother-in-law is kidnapped. You sure there's nothing worse?
Stu: We're not gonna kill the dogs, Chow. This will knock them out for hours. Mr. Chow: Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know you worked for PETA. What a pussy.
Mr. Chow: So long, bitches! Mr. Chow: I believe I can fly... I love cocaine!
Phil: Damn it! I left my phone in the Minivan. Alan: Oh Phil, I have that find my phone app. Phil: Alan, we have bigger problems than that at the moment. Stu: No wait. If Chow has the minivan and your phone is in the minivan that means your phone is with Chow. Alan: Stu, you heard Phil. We have bigger problems than that.
Alan: You know what, guys. You can go ahead without me. There's something I need to do. Stu: Do you even know how to get home? Alan: Of course I do. I'm a grown man. I'll ask a stranger. Phil: Good luck, Alan. We'll see you soon.
Alan: Leslie, get down from there! Please, you're gonna hurt yourself! Mr. Chow: Nothing hurts Chow. I am invisible! Phil: It's invincible, and you're not, you're just out of your fucking mind!
Marshall: Leslie Chow never lived here. You didn't break into his old house, you broke into MY house. Phil: I don't understand. Marshall: You didn't get back the gold he stole from me. You got the other half that he didn't. Stu: Oh, my GOD! Phil: You mean the half he never had? Marshall: He's a world-class rat, and you 3 were his accomplices. Stu: We had no idea! Phil: We were trying to help you! We thought you'd be happy! Marshall: Thank you so much! Thank you for ripping me off! Thank you for desecrating my home! And THANK YOU FOR KILLING MY FUCKING DOGS! Stu: We didn't kill your dogs! They're just tranquilized. Marshall: Oh, right. You don't know. Chow snapped their necks on his way out. Stu: What? Black Doug: And somebody's gotta pay. Marshall: He's right. Doug: No no no no, NO! Marshall: My head of security, couldn't stop 3 fuck-ups and a Chinaman with a pair of wire cutters. Unreal.
Stu: This is so much harder than you realise, Phil. I'm just a dentist! Phil: No, Stu, you're a fucking doctor. Now go get him!
Alan: She's my soulmate and my new best friend. Plus, she lets me mount her, which relaxes me. Phil: Oh my God. Doug: Uh, Alan, maybe never say that part again. Alan: Chillax, Doug. We're all adults here. I know you mount my sister. I've seen it. Many times.
Phil: No that's perfect, that's like a three hour drive from here. Alan: Yeah Stu, try reading a map. Stu: Yeah Alan, try reading... anything... ever. Alan: Yeah Stu, try having not such big horse teeth.
Stu: I told myself, I would never come back. Phil: Don't worry, it all ends tonight...
Stu: You just saw a man get murdered, your brother in law is kidnapped. Are you sure there is nothing worse? Alan: You don't get it Stu. You just don't get it do you? I have over 60 apps on that phone! What if I lost my phone? Do you know how much time and man hours it would take to redownload those apps? Stu: You are right. I didn't think about that, thank you.
Sid: That was the Mayor, Alan. Alan: It was an accident. You said you love me no matter what I did. Sid: I know and I do. You're my best friend but Alan why would you buy a giraffe? Alan: I always wanted one! Could feed him from my tree house. Besides they remind me a lot of myself. Sid: In what way? Alan: They're majestic. Pensive and tall. Sid: Pensive? Alan: Yeah! Sid: Where did you learn that word? Alan: Rhymes with friends. Sid: What friends Alan? Alan: You can say it on random. Sid: Alan aside from the fact that you shut down a freeway, you murdered a wild animal. It's national news. You don't want to know the checks I had to write to fix this! Alan: Oh please! We're rich! Sid: We're not anything Alan! I am well off! You are my 40 year old son... Alan: 42! Sid: ...42 year old son who still lives at home! You either go back on your medication or I'm cutting you off! Alan: You're bluffing. When 's dinner? Sid: You're mother and I can't take it anymore!
Phil: I was just talking to Cassie. She's an amazing woman. Alan: Oh, thank you for saying that. She is an amazing woman. I find her much better than your wives.
Mr. Chow: Who sent you? Phil: No one! No. We just wanted to see you! Mr. Chow: Liar! No one wants to see Chow!
Alan: Hey, you're Black Doug! That's Black Doug! Black Doug: Shut the fuck up with that. Shut the fuck up. Stu: Oh my God. It is. Alan, tell me right now why is Black Doug kidnapping us? Black Doug: I said don't call me that shit no more! It ain't Alan's fault. Alan: Thank you, Black Doug. Black Doug: Ooh! Mother fuck...! I will... Fucker! Alan, Phil: Doug! Okay, okay. Just Doug, okay? Phil: Why are you doing this? Marshall: Because Marshall: I told him to. I'm Marshall. And whether you know it or not, we all have something in common, and it all started four years ago, when this moron sold the wrong drugs to this dumb fuck. Marshall: You have no idea the chain of events that were set in motion that night. In the parking lot of a fucking liquor store.
